


Cartman's Super Kewl Awesome Party || South Park

by talia571



Category: South Park
Genre: F/M, High School, Kenny McCormick - Freeform, Kyle Broflovski - Freeform, Party, Stan Marsh - Freeform, south park - Freeform, teen, tweek tweak - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-01
Updated: 2017-01-13
Packaged: 2018-09-14 00:36:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9148915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/talia571/pseuds/talia571
Summary: Cartman is having a party filled with new girls, truth or dare, spin the bottle and more! But what will happen? With two new girls in town, things become more interesting. Will Kenny die? Will Tweek drink Coffee? Will Cartman still be fat? Find out the story of Rosa, Kenny, Sadie and Tweek.  Made by Frogsdolphins and Talia571 (https://www.wattpad.com/user/frogsdolphins)





	1. Free Alcohol!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cartman decides to throw a party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is co-written by my sister who does not have an account on this site. Big thanks to her for working with me on this book!

**01\. Free Alcohol!**

**Cartman**

Flyers flew out of Eric's chubby fingers. Kyle, Stan and Kenny were at their lockers. He quickened his pace and joined them.

"Hey you guys! You're all invited to ma partieee. Except you Keahl. You're not keeewwlll enough." Cartman said.

"Fuck you, Fatass! I don't want to come to your stupid party anyways!" Kyle growled. This offended Eric.

"HEY! Fine, quit begging. I guess you can come to my party. Only because you asked sooo nicely." Cartman sighed, placing badly-drawn flyers into the hands of his friends. Eric left them to locate more people worthy of attending what would be the party of the century. So awesome and so kewl, just like him. Wendy and her group of girls were chatting away in the cafeteria. Cartman took a seat beside Bebe.

"What do you want, Cartman?" Wendy frowned as they eyes of her friends looked directly at him, clearly disgusted.

"Weeelll, I'm having a partay. You guys are all invited. My house, tomorrow night. Everyone's gonna be there." He passed out flyers.

"Why would we want to go to a party at your house? Especially with boys! Eww!" Heidi stuck her tongue, horrified.

"C-Cause its gonna be so kewl and awesome!" Cartman sounded a little whiny.

"Fuck off Cartman!" Bebe added.

"Yeah-" Wendy started.

"It could be fun, what if some cute guys are there?" Red smiled, interrupting Wendy.

"Fine. We'll go but if you try anything, we will all leave and I personally will punch you in your fat stomach until you throw up all of that KFC!" Wendy glared at Cartman.

"I don't know what you mean. It's just going to be an awesome-ass party." He smiled innocently as he walked away. Searching for more people he muttered under his breath, "Fucking bitch."

"Did you find anyone who would actually go to your stupid party?" Kyle mocked.

"As a matter of fact I did. Wendy and her gang of whores are coming, Keahl." Cartman bragged as he sat down with the boys that were now in the cafeteria.

"How much did you pay them?" Stan laughed. Kyle gave Stan a smile and look of approval.

"Screw you guys! You'll regret your mocking once you see how many people show up. Unlike your party at Casa Bonita, everyone is invited." Eric lifted his chins in the air. Except for those nerds like Kevin, he thought to himself. Cartman stood up and went to go see if there was anyone left who he had not yet invited. He noticed two girls that he hadn't seen before.

"Kewl." Eric said to himself as he walked over to them. "New girls. I can't wait to see the look on Kahl's face when he sees that I got the new girls to come. He he he." Cartman glanced between the blondie and the girl with burgundy hair.

"Hi...Can I help you?" asked the one with wavy locks of burgundy hair.

"Hey, I just haven't seen you guys here before and I wanted to see if you'd like to come to mah super-kewl and awesome party. There will be lots of people there and food and games and stuff. I love including new kids because once I was a new kid and I know how it feels trying to fit in." Cartman shuffled his feet on the ground, grinning innocently.

"Hm, how nice. That sounds fun. I'm Sadie and this is Rosa." She brushed her dark red hair aside. Rosa looked up from her lunch, shyly.

"Oh...uh. H-hello." She put her sandwich down.

"Its Eric, Eric Cartman." Eric smiled at Rosa and Sadie. "So...I'll see you guys there? My house is the green one and the party is tomorrow night."

"You bet. We'll be there." Sadie nodded, a wide grin on her face.

"Sweet." Cartman smiled. "Anyways," he handed Sadie a flyer. "See you there, I have to go back to my friends now. They're probably worrying about me." Cartman eyed Craig's gang and made his way towards them.

Cartman arrived at their table. Craig, Clyde, Token, Tweek, and Jimmy raised their eyebrows at his approach.

"What do you want?" Craig muttered emotionlessly to Eric.

"Nothing much Craig, I was just wondering if you guys wanted to come to mah awesome party tomorrow night. Everyone will be there" Cartman smiled as he handed Tweek and Clyde a few of the Crayon-drawn flyers.

"N-No way man! Nggh-He'll probably kidnap us and drug us! Gah!" Tweek said in his panicky tone. He twitched and studied the flyer.

"Tweek, Shut up." Cartman said dryly and gave the other members flyers. "I even got the girls to come, and those new girls that arrived today or something."

"Fine Cartman-" Craig started.

"HELL YEAH GIRLS!" Clyde interrupted Craig, grinning wildly.

"I think that- I think that- I-I think that'd be great." Jimmy stuttered.

"Okay, I'll see you guys there." Cartman skipped off, throwing flyers at random kids as he passed. He taped a flyer to Timmy's wheelchair. "Hmmm." He walked up to the goth kids. Firkle glared at him.

"What do you want, Communist?" the Kindergartener said coldly.

"I'm having a party tomorrow night and I was wondering if you guys wanted to come." Cartman tossed flyers at their feet.

"No." Pete sighed.

"But-" Cartman quickly thought of something "There will be booze-"

"Alright, but we aren't your friends or anything." Henrietta said before taking a deep breath of her pipe and exhaling the smoke. Cartman decided to ignore that comment.

"If your party is lame, which it probably will be, don't expect us to stay. We don't want to hang around with a bunch of Communist whores." Pete added. "We're just coming for the alcohol."

"Yeah." Michael and Henrietta agreed. Cartman nodded pleasantly and once again joined his group of friends.

"So who'd you scrape up, Fatass?" Kyle sighed.

"Mrffh murrhhh mrrfh nfghh" Kenny joked, giggling.

"Shahd-up Kenny!" Cartman yelled. "And for your information, Kahl, I got everyone to come. I even got the new girls!"

"Mnffgh mfghgh nghh merrr mffh?" Kenny said as he pretended to grope an ass. He snickered. Stan raised an eyebrow at Kenny and sighed.

"That's fucking gross, dude." Stan shook his head. Kenny giggled.

"Hey fellas." Butters walked up to the group. He glanced at the flyers in everyone's hands. "Aw hamburgers, I didn't get a flyer. Am I too late? My parents will ground me if I don't socialize!"

"So since everyone will be there it's gonna be like, the keeewwlest party ever." Cartman looked at Butters and raised an eyebrow. "Ah, Butters. I knew I was forgetting someone." He placed a flyer in his hands.

"No it won't Fatass. It's probably gonna be lame like every other party you've thrown." Kyle frowned, crossing his arms. Cartman glared at Kyle.

"Shut up, Jew! I didn't have to invite you! I couldn't take your begging anymore so I invited you. I can un-invite you just as easily."

"I don't want to come, Cartman." Kyle sighed.

"Wow, Keahl. I'd expect more from a Jew. You'd better come." Eric warned him.

"Well, thank you Eric." Butters looked at the flyer in his hand. "Wow, this'll sure be fun!" Butters said cheerfully. The guys made jokes about how lame Cartman's party would be, to his disapproval. Butters and Kenny were the only ones who thought it'd be cool. Kenny was only excited because of the girls. What idiots. This party will be amazing. Fuck those guys. They're just jealous that they can't throw awesome parties like I can, Cartman thought.


	2. I Knew You Guys Were Gay!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cartman's party kicks off.

**02\. I Knew You Guys Were Gay!**

**The Next Day....**

**Kyle**

"Why am I doing this?" Kyle asked himself over and over as he got ready for Cartman's party. It was already dark outside, but the lights from the houses and the headlights of approaching cars illuminated the street.

"Hello Bebe. Wendy. Nice to see you Token." Cartman greeted his guests. "Well hello Kahl. I see that you decided to show up to my super awesome partah." Why did I even come? Kyle asked himself again.

"I'm only coming because my friends are here, Cartman." Kyle defended himself. He entered the house with Stan and Kenny. The girls were already there along with Butters and Craig's gang.

"I didn't think he was serious about the girls." Stan gasped. Kenny clapped his hands together and let out a quiet 'woo-hoo'.

"Where did Kenny go?" Kyle asked Stan. Their friend had disappeared, literally only moments after they had arrived. He looked around to find Kenny with a group of girls, flirting. Kyle and Stan sighed in unison before going after their perverted friend.

**Sadie**

Sadie smiled at Cartman as she pulled Rosa into the party. "Woah, look at how many people there are!" Sadie laughed.

"What? Don't leave me on my own!" Rosa looked around, biting her lip. Boy, she really needs to come out of her shell. Hopefully dragging her ass to a party will help.

"I'm gonna go meet everyone!" Sadie ran off towards Craig and his friends. Rosa tagged along quietly. "Hi!" Sadie smiled at a boy in a blue hat and his gang. She wiggled her fingers flirtatiously as she greeted them. Hm, these boys are kinda cute. Maybe Rosa could date one of them...Hm...

"Hi." The boy with the blue hat said with an expressionless tone. "I'm Craig, this is Tweek." Craig pointed at a twitchy boy with long, wild blonde hair.

"Nggh! Hiya!" Tweek tilted his head and closed one of his eyes.

"I'm Sadi-." She began.

"Clyde!" Clyde shoved his two friends out of the way and stood with one leg crossed over the other. He winked at her, a confident grin on his face. Sadie laughed and moved some of her hair behind her ear. Tweek dropped his coffee when Clyde did this, causing him to scream out profanities and unlikely situations that could happen as a result of the spilled coffee.

"Dammit Clyde." Craig sighed. "Tweek, shut up. We can get you more coffee."

"Heh, sorry." Clyde, still looking at Sadie, picked up the mug. He pressed it into Tweek's twitching fingers.

"Token, can you go with Tweek to get him more coffee?" Craig shook his head.

"Sure, c'mon Tweek." The dark-skinned boy named Token lead Tweek away into the Cartman's kitchen. Sadie smiled nervously.

"I'm sorr-" she began to say before was cut off.

"It's not your fault, it's Clyde's for being a confident douchebag." Craig muttered.

"He he. Whoops." Clyde grinned, a small blush on his face. He wandered off to check on Tweek and Token.

"Anyways, I'm Craig as I already mentioned. The twitchy one is Tweek. Token went to help him and of course, Clyde." Craig motioned to himself and the directions that his friends had gone, clearly bored.

"Well I'm Sadie and this is Rosa." She pointed towards Rosa, who was standing awkwardly behind Sadie.

"Hi..." Rosa looked up quietly with a small smile on her face. Tweek, who had returned with Token, checked a small black Samsung for the time.

"Dammit. Where is Jimmy?" Tweek twitched. "He's late! What if he's in trouble? Gah!" As soon as he said this, the doorbell rang. The large boy named Cartman answered it to reveal a boy on crutches and some goths.

"Oh, there he is. Jimmy! Over here!" Token called out to the boy on crutches. Jimmy hobbled over to the group.

"Hey g-g-guys. Who's this?" Jimmy studied Rosa and Sadie. Sadie noticed Rosa looking at the ground, shuffling her feet.

"I'm Sadie, this is Rosa. She's pretty shy, so don't be surprised if she doesn't say much." Sadie grinned at Jimmy. Rosa smiled.

"Hi." Rosa waved, avoiding eye-contact. Jimmy returned the wave. Suddenly, Cartman stood on a chair and clicked a fork against a glass to get everyone's attention. Sadie looked up, startled by the sound.

"Everyone," Cartman glanced across the room to make sure that they were listening. "Alright everybody, let's start this super awesome partay." His introduction was followed by a few 'Woo-hoos'.

"Where's the booze?" Michael asked, flipping his hair.

"We shall play Spin The Bottle to start!" Cartman got off the chair, ignoring the goth kids. He placed an empty wine bottle, that his mother recently drank, on the floor. When he got back everyone was in a circle except the goth kids, who were in the corner ignoring everyone.

"Fuck this. We came for binge drinking and to talk about our pain, not some lame-ass communist party. We're outta here." The Goth Kids left the house.

"Fuck you guys! We didn't want to hear about your gay pain stories anyways!" Cartman shouted after them. He turned back to the crowd of guests. "Ok, rules. You can't chicken out. Guy on guy, girl on girl, doesn't matter. You've still gotta do it! Don't be a bunch of pussies! Well, well. I think that's it. Game on." Cartman sat himself beside Kenny and Wendy, Wendy glared at him but didn't say anything. Rosa quickly found a seat beside Sadie and Craig.

"Ok, who goes first?" Clyde asked, taking a seat beside Craig.

"Dude, everyone has to spin so it doesn't matter. Duh" Cartman explained to Clyde.

"I'll go first!" Sadie offered happily. Hopefully I get one of the good-lookin' boys. She grinned, eyeing each of the boys. Rosa clearly didn't want to go or be chosen. Everyone watched in anticipation as the bottle span around, over and over again. Eventually it slowed down and nearly landed on Clyde, who grinned only to find that it instead landed on the blonde boy called Butters.

"Aww hamburgers..." Butters bumped his knuckles together.

"Is there an issue?" Sadie said, suddenly self-conscious.

"Well, its uh my girl Lexas, she'll be awfully mad at me." Butters looked around nervously.

"Then why the fuck are you playing Butters? Jeez. That whore isn't even your girlfriend." Cartman shook his head.

"Course she is! Well, uh.. alright I guess." Sadie closed in on Butters and kissed him for a solid ten seconds before letting go. Butters blushed, exhaling. "Whew-whee. He he."

"Heh heh, my turn." Clyde chuckled, quite confident. The bottle landed on Milly, who nervously went to Clyde and pecked him on the lips. "Oh yeah." He grinned.

"Oh jeez." Craig spun the bottle and to his dread it landed on Token. "Fuck that!"

"No way guys!" Token said, both horrified and embarrassed.

"Rules are rules assholes!" Cartman reminded them and he shoved them together. They briefly touched lips then immediately pulled away from each other. Craig dramatically scraped at his tongue while Token stared at the floor. Sadie hoped that she wouldn't end up getting Rosa. Rosa was too shy and awkward to handle that kind of pressure.

"Ha! Fags!" Cartman snickered before giving the bottle to Jimmy. Jimmy smiled as it span. It landed on Heidi.

"Wow I'm- Wow I'm- I'm- I'm getting- Wow I'm getting all the- Wow I'm getting- I'm getting all the- Wo- Wow I'm getting all the babes." After their kiss, it was Timmy's turn. He spun the bottle and got Esther.

"Timmeh.." He puffed out his chest, grinning. Craig made some comment about how unfair it was that Timmy got someone better than he did. Rosa crossed her fingers every time the bottle came near her, Sadie noticed. Butters sighed when his turn came around.

"Uh oh, not this again." The bottle landed on Annie, who kissed him briefly then sat down again. Kyle spun the bottle, which landed on Sadie. She skipped over to him and kissed him, winking afterwards. Kyle quickly pumped his fist down, relieved to get a decent match.

"Yess!" Kyle muttered under his breath. Stan then spun the bottle, which landed on Kyle.

"Oh, fuck! Dude..No!" Stan screamed. He pushed the bottle so it landed on Wendy instead. Cartman cackled evilly.

"I always knew you two were gay. Ha ha ha! KISS FAGGOTS!" Cartman clapped his hands together, laughing hysterically. Cartman waited for the two to perform their duties, but they didn't. He put his phone down, which had been poised to take a photo. "Do I need to push you together? Reewwwlllss aree reeewllls, Keahl." Stan and Kyle both sighed and touched lips for a millisecond before spitting on the ground beside them. Wow, this guy is an asshole. Sadie thought, staring at Cartman. Gotta admit, he is kinda funny though. She watched as Kenny eagerly spun the bottle. It landed on Red which made Kenny jump up happily. Red kissed him quickly and Kenny sighed at the lack of action.

"Heh heh heh, you have herpes now." Cartman snickered, pointing at Red. She glared at him. Cartman ignored the glare and span the bottle which landed on himself. "Wow, okay. I'll just kiss myself." Eric smiled, planting a kiss on his fat fingers.

"No, Fatass, you have to spin again." Kyle argued. Damn right you have to spin again, asshole. Sadie chuckled.

"Yeah, Cartman. That's cheating!" Bebe agreed.

"Fine." Cartman whipped the bottle around again and like last time, it just landed on himself. "Goddammit!" He spat. After the third spin, it landed on Lola.

"Eww! Noooo!" Lola shrieked. Suck it up, Princess. Sadie rolled her eyes, Prissy bitches these days... Cartman kissed her quickly. She screamed and ran to her friends, who comforted her. Cartman swore and passed the bottle to Wendy, wiping his lips with his red sleeves. She crossed her fingers and spun the bottle. To her disappointment, the bottle pointed directly at Clyde Donovan. Sadie snickered as Wendy's face froze in horror. Stan's eyes narrowed. She didn't really know much about these people but she assumed Stan and Wendy were either dating or he liked her. Either way, this wasn't going to end well.

"Awesome." Clyde said in his nasally voice. He pressed himself against her. Wendy kissed him lightly. But when she tried to pull back, he held her there. She noticed Clyde trying to stick his tongue in Wendy's mouth. Sadie gagged as she watched the borderline sexual assault. Clyde finally stopped and Wendy squealed unhappily.

"Eww! Clyde, gross!" Wendy shrieked.

"Fuck you, Clyde! That's my girlfriend you asshole!" Stan raced across the diameter of the circle and punched Clyde straight in the mouth. Blood dripped from Clyde's lips. Rosa gasped beside Sadie. Sadie knew Rosa hated violence. These kids were very different from the kids at their old school. Things escalated quickly and the two boys were in a full blown brawl.

"Fight! Fight! Fight!" Kenny cheered in his signature muffled tone. Cartman recorded the fight on his phone. He captured all of the foul language and fist collisions on his phone.

"Enough guys!" Kyle pinned Stan to the ground. Craig did the same with Clyde. Bebe's spin decided she had to kiss a beat-up Stan Marsh. Annie got Timmy, Lola kissed Craig, Nichole's spin chose Heidi and then Milly's bottle pointed at Bebe. Kenny watched excitedly when the two girls kissed.

"Woo hoo!" Kenny squeaked. Red had to kiss Jimmy. Heidi got Token which made Cartman make a remark about Heidi and her bi-racial affairs.

"Token and Nichole in one day. Jeez Heidi. Token and Nichole belong together and you can't do anything about it." Eric taunted. Tweek's breathing quickened when his turn came around. He attempted to stall.

"Woo, won't you look at the time? How about we do something else? Gah! C'mon let's do something else. Can I skip my turn? Ngh! Pass!" He twitched. Tweek closed his eyes then spun the bottle, after Cartman refused to let him pass. If this kid was so uncomfortable with the no-pass rule, he should've gone home ages ago. What a pussy, it's one damn kiss, Sadie snickered quietly. Tweek opened his eyes to see that he got Nichole, Token's girlfriend.

"It's not that bad. At least you don't have to kiss Kenny or Kahl." Cartman snorted. Tweek's eyes popped from his head when he looked at Token.

"Ngggh! No way man! Token's gonna rip my head off and throw it in the ocean! That is WAY too much pressure!" Tweek jumped up and sprinted towards the bathroom, where he locked himself inside.

"Wow! What a fucking spaz!" Cartman laughed. It was now Rosa's turn. Her best-friend looked up at her, anxiety flashing in her oceanic coloured eyes. Sadie looked at her reassuringly. Sadie watched Rosa hesitantly spin the empty wine bottle. It slowed down from Cartman to Kenny to Stan. It finally halted, pointing the opening at Kyle Broflovski. Rosa relaxed a little, but her shoulders remained tense. Kyle and Rosa kissed quickly, returning to their places after.

"See, it's not that bad?" Sadie whispered to Rosa, grinning at her blushing friend. Rosa smiled, relaxing her formerly tense shoulders.

"Well then..That's everyone. Okay you guys. Another game." Cartman announced.

"What game?" Sadie questioned. Hopefully it's a little more action-packed than 'Spin the Bottle'. Sadie arched her brow, staring at Cartman.

"Truth or Dare." He picked up a bucket of chicken, clutching it to his man-titties. "Again, no chickening out and speaking of chicken, DON'T TOUCH MA CHICKEN KENNY!" Cartman glared at Kenny, who was reaching towards the bucket. Shit, I kinda wanted some of that, Sadie drank in the sight of greasy bucket in Cartman's hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am a very pro-LGBTQ+ person and so is my sister. I just want to let you know that we do NOT agree with the discrimination of people based on sexual orientation and gender identification. Hell, I don't even like swearing but we are writing based on the character's personality. Just because we are sensitive to different ethnicities/religions/sexual orientations/etc. , doesn't mean Cartman or any of the South Park kids are. I mean, come on. This is South Park we are talking about. There is a lot of rude jokes and swearing. I just wanted to let you know that just because a character says something, doesn't mean either my sister of myself agree with it.
> 
> Thanks for reading! - Talia and on behalf of my sister.


	3. Rule Number Two: Answer Honestly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The party continues with a switch of games.

**03\. Rule Number Two: Answer Honestly**

**Rosa**

"Again, sorry for asking, but who's going first?" Clyde raised his eyebrow. Not another game, Rosa shuddered.

"We do what we did for Spin The Bottle." Cartman replied. "I'll go first this time." Cartman cackled and looked around the group, rubbing his hands together as if he was plotting something diabolical. "Truth or dare, Kahl?" Kyle sighed.

"Oh god, why did you have to choose me?" Kyle rubbed his chin between his gloved fingers. "Dar-...er truth, I guess..."

"Okay, we all know you're a filthy jew-" Cartman began.

"Fuck you, Fatass!"

"Kyle, just listen. How homo are you? Really? I know you liked your kiss with Stan, are you two secretly a couple, do you have a crush on any guys-" Eric tore into another piece of chicken.

"Dude!" Kyle yelled slightly horrified.

"ONE QUESTION DWEEB!" Sadie threw a pillow playfully at Cartman. Rosa wished she could be so confident and outgoing around people she had just met like Sadie.

"Okay, okay, Keahl, how gay are you?" Cartman turned his drumstick to the side then looked up at Kyle. "We all know you suck dick Kahl, it's just a matter of how much."

"I'm not gay!" Kyle fumed, balling up his fists. Please not another fight, she raised her eyebrows.

"Rule number two Keahl, answer honestly." Cartman glanced at his wrist, inspecting the time on his imaginary watch. "We don't have all day Keahl."

"You aren't even a little bi-curious?" Sadie chimed in, leaning toward Kyle for an answer.

"Hey, I'm bi-curious!" Butters giggled. Everyone looked at Butters, but didn't say anything.

"Hurry up and answer Kyle." Craig added.

"I'm not gay!" Kyle repeated. "You're not gonna get a different answer, Cartman."

"Fine." Cartman sighed. "Your turn Kahl."

"Wendy, truth or dare?" Kyle sighed. Looks like I'm not the only one who doesn't want to play anymore. Rosa mused.

"Truth." Wendy sighed

"Who would you rather do, Stan or Token?" Kyle snickered. Cartman seemed pleased by this question.

"Uhh, Stan of course!" Wendy shifted uncomfortably. "He is my boyfriend, after all. Anyways, watch how the pros do it." She smiled, looked around at her giggling friends and cracked her knuckles. She must be referring to girls' ability to play truth or dare, Rosa guessed. Either that, or there is some inside joke I'm missing.

"Butters, truth or dare?" Wendy smiled devilishly. I didn't like these truths, maybe I should pick dare.

"Aww jeez, truth?" Butters smiled nervously, playing with his hands.

"If you had to date any guy in here, who would you choose?" Wendy asked Butters, which resulted in a high-five from Bebe.

"Oh....well I dunno...er...Stan? I guess. Good thing I like girls, huh?" Butters replied nervously.

"What? Really? Er..." Stan raised an eyebrow at Butters who ignored him.

"Um...Bebe, t-truth or dare?" Butters asked.

"Huh? Oh, Truth." Bebe looked up from her nails.

"Would you r-rather get mauled by a bear or thrown into the o-ocean with a cement block?" Butters asked her and everyone was surprised at the violence of the question.

"Ummm ocean..." Bebe sighed as she looked around. "Clyde, truth or-"

"Dare." He quickly cut in.

"Seven Minutes In Heaven with someone of your choice." She said quickly, after pausing.

"Ok... Bebe in the closet." Clyde winked at her.

"WHAT? Fuck! That's not what I meant!" Bebe sighed and followed Clyde reluctantly. He closed the door behind them, winking at the watching crowd. You set yourself up for that one, Rosa thought.

"Who wants to bet on rape?" Sadie laughed and Stan jokingly held out a five. Kenny snickered but Bebe's friends were not amused. After 7 minutes they came out, When Clyde came out of the closet covered in lipstick marks. Stan looked questionably at Bebe, while Sadie gave him five bucks. Clyde asked Annie, who chose truth. Seriously, these truths are quite personal. Why would you want to pick truth? Nobody said you had to do anything in the closet for Seven Minutes In Heaven...Rosa just didn't understand.

"Which guys would you date in here?" Clyde smirked.

"Um.." Annie shifted, looking around. "Stan, Kyle, Jimmy, Token and maybe Craig." Annie's face reddened. Craig sighed. Wow, not as great as he thinks he is, I guess. Rosa snickered then turned to Sadie to tell her the same thing.

"No kidding. That asshole is full of himself. He's kinda cute though, I'll give him that." Sadie laughed. The game continued.

"Okay then." Annie sighed "Truth or dare....Jimmy."

"D-D-Da-Dare please." Jimmy decided.

"Lick the floor where Tweek spilled the coffee." A grin came up on her face. Good one, Rosa mused.

"Okay." Jimmy crawled over to the brown puddle that was now staining the carpet. He lowered his face down and licked it, gagging. "E-Eww that was g-g-gro, that was gr-. That was gross, fellas."

"Heh heh, that was sick." Cartman snickered, "I can't believe you- wait Tweek spilled his coffee on my floor?!" Cartman sighed, "Maaaaaaammmm!"

"Yes, Poopsikins?" called from the kitchen.

"Bitch, don't call me that!" He shouted. "Mom there's coffee on the floor! Clean it up!"

"Now, Eric. Don't talk to me like that, Sweetie. I'll come clean it up in a minute." She replied, pleasantly. As she cleaned the coffee up off of the carpet, Tweek approached the group cautiously. He darted his eyes back and forth between everyone.

"You didn't miss too much, Tweek. Few dares, few truths, nothing too big except Clyde and Bebe did 7 Minutes In Heaven in the closet. Clyde came out covered in kisses!" Sadie grimaced playfully. "I lost 5 bucks cause of that!" She glanced at Stan, grinning. He grinned back at her. Well, at least not all of these people are horrible. Rosa smiled at Sadie.

"O-Okay." Tweek took his place beside Craig and Clyde.

"C-can I can I- Can I ask now?" Jimmy asked, clearly bored.

"Sure whatever." Cartman gestured with his hand.

"T-Timmy, t-truth or d-d-dare" Jimmy asked the boy confined to a wheelchair. The party guests all gave Jimmy a puzzled look.

"Timmeh!" Timmy replied happily.

"What?" Cartman spat. "Seriouslah, dude? All he can say is his name. How do you expect him to answer?" Timmy narrowed his eyes at Cartman, a clear frown present on his face. He could have put that in a more polite way but he's got a point...Rosa cocked her head to the side.

"W-Who Do you li, who do-do-, who do you-li-like?"Jimmy asked his friend, ignoring Cartman. Timmy smiled at Jimmy.

"Timmeh!" Timmy replied. Jimmy smiled at him.

"Great choice, Ti-Timmy." Jimmy high-fived Timmy.

"For fuck's sake." Cartman sighed.

"Timmeh Ti-Timmeh Tim ?" Timmy asked Token.

"Dare?" Token tipped his head to the side, one eyebrow raised.

"Timmeh Tim Timmeh Tim Timmeh!" Timmy instructed.

"Sorry Timmy, I have no idea what you said." Token apologized. He faced Craig. "Truth or dare, Craig?"

"Yeah yeah Dare" Craig mumbled. Token bit his lip, staring at the ground. A clinking sound from Cartman's glass of ice water caused Token to look up. He stared directly at the little ice cubes floating around in the glass.

"Put ice down your shirt and pants until it melts?" Token suggested.

"Maaaaaaammm! We need iiiiceee cuuuubeeess!" Cartman shouted.

"Okay, Sweetie." entered the room minutes later with a tray of ice cubes. She shuffled off to her room. As soon as she was gone, Cartman snatched up the tray.

"He he he." Cartman poured half of the ice cubes down Craig's shirt. Craig flinched then took the tray from Cartman. He emptied the other half into his pants. Craig shivered and cursed under his breath.

"Tweek...truth... or d-dare?" Craig grimaced.

"Can't imagine that would be very pleasant." Rosa told Sadie. She laughed.

"No kidding. I'll pass on that one." She snorted.

"Gah! Why me?! Uh...fine...Dare!" Tweek was cocking his head and messing with his fingers. His eyes were wide, yet cautious as he waited for his instructions.

"Chug a whole pot of coffee." Craig shrugged.

"THATS WAYYY TOO MUCH PRESSURE MAN!" Tweek pulled a little bit of his hair out. "What if I can't do it? Everyone is expecting me to be able to drink it all. Too much pressure!"

"You were gonna drink it anyways." Craig pointed out.

"Uh, okay. Fine..." Tweek calmed down a bit while Cartman's mom brought the coffee, as Eric requested. Tweek stared at the coffee. He twitched then brought the pot to his lips. Sure enough, he was able to down the whole thing. He wiped his mouth with his sleeve. "Gah! Okay, I'm done now!"

"Good job!" Sadie applauded the twitching blonde. "It's your turn to ask somebody now."

"What?! Uhhh- Jeez!" Tweek looked around frantically, then beside him."Uh..uh...uh...you!" Tweek stared at Sadie. Rosa widened her eyes. She knew she would get asked next. Luckily, Sadie wouldn't be too hard on her. Would she? Her breathing quickened.

"Dare!" Sadie smiled.

"Uhhh- I DON'T KNOW, MAN!- DO WHATEVER YOU WANT! DECIDING IS TOO MUCH PRESSURE!" Tweek screamed. Sadie pulled a devilish smile. I know that smile, Rosa couldn't help but snicker. Sadie cocked her brow, then leaned towards Tweek.

"Whatever I want?" Sadie shrugged. She crushed her lips against Tweek's. His surprised shriek was muffled by her best friend's lips. Rosa giggled quietly to herself. Everyone raised their eyebrows, jaws dropped.

"Fuck." Clyde said, appearing to be a little jealous. Sadie broke away from Tweek and shrugged like it was nothing.

"Holy shit!" Tweek squeaked. Sadie shrugged away.

"You said anything. First thing I thought of." Sadie explained.

"Fuck." Clyde repeated. Everyone relaxed and turned their gaze away from Sadie and a shocked Tweek. Sadie looked around.

"Who hasn't been picked yet?" Sadie bit her lip. Rosa knew that was a rhetorical question. Sadie would pick her. Please be nice to me, Rosa crossed her fingers. "Rosa! Truth or dare, girl?"

Rosa closed her eyes and released a sigh. She didn't want all of these people getting into her head. She didn't want them to know much about her, not all of them. Her only other choice was a dare. Sadie wouldn't be too mean, hopefully. Plus none of these dares had been so bad, had they? The worst was probably the closet time with Clyde but who said you had to do anything in there? Dare, I've got to pick dare.

"Dare." Rosa stated. Sadie clapped once then scanned the crowd. She looked at Clyde who still had a lipstick stain on his cheek. She noticed Sadie staring at the kiss mark. No! No more kissing!

"Gonna steal your idea, Bebe." Sadie decided. Rosa's jaw dropped. Not Clyde! Noo way!

"You don't mean?" She shook her head. Sadie fought a smile.

"Yes, Rose. Seven Minutes In Heaven." Sadie confirmed. "Not with you Clyde." Clyde sighed. "Sorry Rosa. Hey Cartman, you said this kid has herpes?" She pointed at Kenny.

"Hey!" Kenny shouted, high-pitched and muffled.

"Yes, Kenny is poor and diseased. He probably has gonorrhea too." Cartman explained.

"Fuck you, Eric!" Kenny growled.

"Okay, Rosa. Seven Minutes In Heaven with Kenny." Sadie snickered, rubbing her hands together. Kenny giggled quietly.

"Heh heh." Cartman chuckled. "Don't come near me after when you're infested with STD's." Kenny screamed profanities at him. Rosa got up. He probably won't touch me. Nobody's making us do anything. It could be so much worse, Rosa told herself. She pulled herself together and followed Kenny into the closet. He shut the door behind them. They heard the door lock. Great. Cartman snickered outside. Rosa smiled shyly at Kenny, who was staring at her.

"I dntnr hfdvegh hepyhrs bde wghew." His voice was muffled by his orange parka.

"What? Sorry I didn't catch that." Rosa replied. The boy removed his hood for the first time that night. His hair spilled out, long and blonde. His hair was messy, but in a cute way.

"I said, I don't have herpes by the way." He repeated. He appeared slightly annoyed. "Or any diseases for that matter. They're just dicks."

"Oh. I didn't think you did. I'm sure you're perfectly normal." She grinned. His face relaxed, a smile now on his face. Sweat beaded on her forehead. The closet was very, very hot. Kenny removed the parka from his top half along with a white t-shirt, revealing a muscular, bare chest. A delicate pink crossed over her cheeks.

"Er, sorry. It's just really hot in here." Kenny smiled, looking at her now rosy cheeks.

"It's okay." Rosa returned the smile. She studied his chest, fighting a smile. Her grey sweater crumpled on the ground when she took it off. Fortunately for her, she had a shirt on underneath.

"Not sure if you heard or not, but my name's Kenny." He held out his hand.

"I'm Rosa, but some people call me Rose." She gently placed her hand in his, shaking it slightly before releasing her grip.

"So, you're new, huh?" Kenny asked her. Rosa nodded. "Where from?"

"Middle of nowhere, pretty much. There was a small school there consisting of only thirty students." She laughed.

"Wow." Kenny joined her, laughing. "So..did you..er... have a boyfriend there or something?" Rosa blushed again, this time harder.

"Er, no. I didn't talk much at my old school." Rosa replied. She found her eyes going back down to his bare chest, only briefly.

"My eyes are up here." Kenny joked. Rosa froze, looking into his eyes. His eyes were a beautiful blue.

"Oh! I....uh....I wasn't er looking...I mean staring at you! I was kind of off into space...." She struggled for an explanation. Of course, that was a lie. She had been staring at his chest but there was no way she'd ever admit that.

"No no. Don't worry, I was just kidding." Kenny chuckled. Rosa sighed, exhaling out.

"You scared me. I thought I was creeping you out or something." She giggled.

"No, you're too cute to be creepy. I'll let you know if you're creeping me out but I doubt that would happen." Kenny grinned at her. Rosa allowed a small smile to creep up on her face.

"Thanks. I'll try not to be creepy." She joked. "So, what's up with that Cartman kid?" Rosa asked Kenny, remembering how rude he was.

"Oh Eric?" Kenny shifted himself so he was leaning against the closet wall. "He's a total asshole, as I'm sure you've noticed." He rolled his eyes. "He doesn't care for anybody but himself. You saw how he is with his mom. Cartman's an ass to everybody! Me, Kyle and Stan included even though we're his friends." Kenny used his fingers to make quotation marks around the word 'friends'. "He's Immature, fat, and overall a huge douchebag. He'll take things way too far just to humiliate someone, get revenge or get what he wants. If I were you, I'd just avoid him."

"Jesus..." Rosa grimaced. "Hm, do you think the seven minutes are up yet? They've got to be."

"Getting tired of me already?" He asked. Rosa thought she caught a glimpse of worry in his eyes.

"No, of course not. It just seems like we've been in here for a while. I don't mind hanging out with you. If you want, we can even hang out after getting out of here." Rosa suggested, grinning. Kenny looked at his phone.

"I'd like that." He smiled. "Oh and it's been about nine minutes."


	4. You Guys Can Stay In There!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenny and Rosa begin to wonder about the party goers' intentions.

**04\. You Guys Can Stay In There!**

**Sadie**

Sadie laughed when she heard Kenny say, "Guys, the seven minutes are up! You can let us out now."

"Cartman, do you really want two diseased people around us?" Sadie tried to convince him. Come on Fatty. Leave 'em in there for a bit. They could both do with some action. I saw that guy's eyes fill with excitement when he got to spin the bottle.

"Aw, fuck no! Leave the fuckers in there. Quarantine for the disease-riddled whores." Cartman twisted his face in disgust. Sorry Rosa but this is for you, Sadie thought to herself. You need a guy, she thought as she walked over to the closet.

"Sorry Rose, but your gonna be in there for a while," Sadie whispered. Before she walked away she added, "Make use of your time." Sadie returned to the circle of people and they resumed the game of Truth or Dare.

**Rosa**

Kenny looked at Rosa, puzzled and she sighed. This was so typical of Sadie.

"What was that all about?" He asked. Rosa's cheeks turned to roses.

"Typical Sadie. Well, she's been dying for me to get with a guy. I guess she was hoping that maybe you and I were going to hook up or something." Rosa pinched the bridge of her nose with her fingers, still blushing. A pink color touched Kenny's cheeks too. Is he blushing? Rosa asked herself in disbelief.

"Is that a bad thing?" He asked.

"Nope. I already told you I like spending time with you." She looked down at the ground, smiling at her feet. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Kenny grin.

"You really do like hanging out with me?" He asked. Rosa looked up at him.

"Yeah. I'm serious. You're a really nice guy from what I can tell so far."

"Thanks. I like hanging out with you, too. It's nice to see you more social. You were deathly quiet out there." Kenny smiled. Rosa loved his smile. It was beautiful like his shining, blue eyes and smooth chest.

"I am pretty quiet, aren't I? I don't do well in large crowds. I didn't really want to come to the party tonight because I had a feeling games like that would be played. I hate being pressured into doing things. I hate Truth or Dare and Spin the Bottle to be honest. I just don't do parties." She admitted.

"I'm glad you came. It's nice to meet someone who isn't a complete douche or who has some grudge against me." Kenny gestured to the door, which separated them from the rest of the party.

"I'm glad I came, too." Rosa confessed. "I thought I was going to hate it when Sadie dragged me here and I did. It was horrible until we got locked in here. This is the best thing that's happened all night." The soft, pink blush on her face transitioned into a deep red. Kenny leaned closer to her face.

"Maybe you should come to parties more often." Kenny suggested. "You make them more interesting. The only reason I showed to Fatass' party was because I had nothing better to do. You know, being locked in the closet isn't so bad." He winked, a small smile on his face. This time, Rosa moved closer to Kenny. Only inches separated their faces. A icy scent filled her nose, drawing her in more. A soft, warm touch presented itself on her cheek. His hand. Her breathing came in short, ragged breaths. Sweat coated her palms.

C'mon Rosa. Go for it. He's a nice guy and everyone does stupid things at parties. It'll please Sadie and if you regret it, whatever. You can forget about him and you could just ignore him at school. Who knows? Maybe he's a great guy. He's been amazing so far. Take a risk for once in your life, Rosa. Kiss him. Kenny sighed, and began to pull away.

"Sorr-" He began to apologize. Oh no. Rosa put her hand in his messy blonde hair. He raised an eyebrow. She closed the distance, pressing her lips against his. Kenny lifted his eyebrows, fighting a smile. Just a second later, he wrapped his hands around her back and leant into the kiss. I've never kissed anyone like this, Rosa thought. The two broke apart for a quick breath then returned to the kiss. Their lips molded together perfectly, as if they were meant to be together. Rosa took a bold move and sat on Kenny's lap, relieving herself from the awkward position they had been in before. Kenny's tongue brushed against her lips, begging to gain access. She could tell that Kenny was more experienced than her, which excited her a little bit. She spread her lips slightly, granting his tongue permission to enter. Rosa's nose crushed against Kenny's face. The kiss lasted just minutes longer before they broke apart, breathless. Their noses were now softly against each other. She stared into his eyes, blue like zircon. His mouth spread into a grin, hers mirroring it.

"Definitely glad I came." Rosa whispered, laughing slightly. Kenny chuckled with her and brushed her honey-coloured hair behind her ear. Rosa blushed slightly, taking notice to his equally golden hair. She curled up in his lap, resting her head on his exposed chest. His skin was warm against her hand that was now feeling the skin under her touch. Kenny embraced Rosa, wrapping his arm around her and reaching for her free hand. He intertwined his fingers with hers. They shared each other's warmth, enjoying their tender, little moment. Rosa glanced up to meet his happy eyes. He smiled, placing a gentle kiss on the top of her head. She closed her eyes, huddling closer to him. Kenny's arms closed tighter around her.

"So how long do you think we're going to be in here?" Rosa asked, opening her eyes to look at him again.

"I don't know." Kenny shrugged, then he smiled. "I wouldn't care if we were in here all night." Rosa brushed her thumb along Kenny's finger.

"Me neither. I'd bet we're having more fun in here than they are out there. I'm so relieved to be away from games like that." She snorted.

"I agree. Can't wait to see the look on Cartman's face when we get out of here and we're actually happier than they are." Kenny snickered. Rosa joined him.

"Wonder what they're doing." She bit her lip. "Probably licking floors and stripping." Kenny nodded in agreement, a smile across his face of pure amusement.


	5. Licking Floors And Stripping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The party takes a disturbing turn when Butters is dared to do something quite disgusting. Meanwhile, Sadie begins to formulate a diabolical plan.

**05\. Licking Floors And Stripping**

**Butters**

"Lick the shit! Lick the shit! Lick the shit!" The group chanted, all except for Butters and a few others. He shuddered as Cartman pushed the litter tray towards him. Butters gagged, the smell of fecal matter filling his nostrils.

Sadie looked at Butters and sighed.

"Does he really have to lick it?" Hope filled Butters. Wow, someone is really stickin' up for me!

"C'mon fellas, do I have to?" He pleaded.

"Fuck yeah, you do. Mmmm, just sniff it Butters. Doesn't it smell delicious? Just one lick. No chickens, it's the rules. Don't like the rules? Leave." Cartman taunted.

"Fuck dude!" Kyle exclaimed.

"Dude, that's sick." Stan frowned.

"Ah, Kahl. Would you rather do it for him? Stan?" When the two boys said nothing, Cartman continued. "Didn't think so. Now, Butters, stop being such a pusseh! made it 'specially for you, Butters." Cartman looked quite pleased. Butters paled, bile coming up in the back of his throat.

"Please. Can't I just do something else?" He begged.

"Fine, I'll help you." Cartman sighed, getting up. He waddled over to him and grabbed a fistful of Butters' blonde hair. Butters squeaked. Uh oh, this isn't gonna go well.

"Aw hamburgers." Butters choked. The catshit squished into Butters' face and hair. The stench choked him, filling his eyes with tears. His lips pressed together firmly, trying to block out a taste which he would rather not experience. He was pulled back and thrown onto the carpet.

"CARTMAN!" A feminine voice shrieked. Tears slowly escaped his eyes, washing bits of the cat-poop down his cheeks. Butters rolled to the side, turning his attention to the angry voice. Cartman was glaring at Sadie.

"What? It's just Butters!" Cartman hissed. The two stared each other down, circling each other with balled fists. Cartman threw a punch but she was too fast. The redhead grabbed his fist. "Wha-" She flipped Cartman onto his back, jiggling as he went down.

"EY!" He reached for Sadie's ankle. She kicked his hand, snapping a punch down to his fat face. Blood dribbled from the fat boy's nose. Cartman lifted his head to say something but his head fell back to the floor, unconscious. Holy hamburgers!

"Seven years of Karate, bitch!" Sadie spat on his still body. Everyone gasped.

"Fuck me." Craig muttered. Sadie dusted her knees off. Kyle and Stan had tears streaming down their faces as they rolled on the ground, struggling to breath. Soon the laughter spread to the girls and Craig's gang. Butters knew they were laughing at Eric but all the same, it hurt that they weren't helping him.

"Fuck, I broke a nail. Asshole..." She directed at Eric Cartman. Sadie approached the weeping Butters. She extended her hand, which he took. Butters was brought to his feet.

"Th-thank you." Butters mumbled. He was led to the bathroom upstairs.

"Sit there." Sadie instructed him. The porcelain was cold against his hands, which he sat on to prevent him from mindlessly wiping away his tears. A navy jacket covered half of Sadie's face. Probably because of me, he assumed.

"I must be pretty stinky, huh?" Butters laughed lightly. Sadie nodded slowly.

"Yeah, but not for long. I'll getcha all cleaned up." She added quickly. His bottom lip came up in a pouty expression. He remembered the shit smeared across his face and he quickly retreated his lower lip. The smell started to nauseate him.

"Ooh, I don't feel so good." Butters complained. Sadie searched through the towels. She selected a towel that was smaller than the others and it had Terrance and Phillip written on it in large letter.

"That's Eric's favourite towel. I wouldn't use that if I were you." He twiddled his thumbs. Eric'll be real sore with me if I use his towel.

"Exactly. Teach that fatass a lesson." Sadie winked as a devilish grin slapped across her face.

"Heh heh. Well okay then, I guess but he'll get real angry." Butters agreed, but he was cautious. If Eric comes after me, she can protect me though. Right? No, Butters, that's silly. You can't make a girl protect you. Protect yourself. He thought of Professor Chaos. I can protect myself. Butters pulled a small smile when Sadie began to wash the foul stench off of his face. She snickered suddenly.

"W-wut?" Butters asked. Is she laughing at me? He frowned, looking at the floor.

"I have an idea." She laughed, interrupting herself. "I'm g-" Giggles burst through her lips. Butters cocked his head to the side.

"Er...are you okay?" He asked. She calmed herself down.

"Okay, okay. I'm gonna hang the towel in Cartman's room...wait, wait. No. I should put it under his bed but right at the back. He'll smell it and look around for the smell and if he finally finds it, he won't be able to reach it cuz he's too fat!" Sadie resumed her laughing fit. Tears waterfalled down her cheeks. Butters had no idea how to react to her laughing except to laugh with her. Butters giggled, picturing the look on Eric's face.

Butters was now scrubbed clean, so shiny you could see your reflection in his skin. He smelled good too.

"Whew, boy am I glad to be all cleaned up." He sighed., grinning at Sadie. "Why, thank you."

"No problem, Butters." She grinned back at him. "You know, punching Cartman is the best thing I've done all day."

"We've all wanted to punch Eric at times." Butters snorted. Eric Cartman truly was a meanie sometimes but at least Butters got to hang out with Eric and his friends sometimes. I mean, Kenny, Kyle and Stan aren't that bad.

"Well, shall we go back to the party now?" Sadie offered. Butters nodded.

"Okie." He agreed. Sadie grinned and led him by the hand down the stairs. I hope she really got 'em good. Eric is a pain in the butt sometimes. "Hey, so are we gonna let Kenny and Rosa out of the closet? I feel kinda bad leavin' 'em in there." Butters ran his hands through his thin, blonde hair. Sadie stopped and pulled him aside on the steps.

"Well, I'm sure you've noticed how....antisocial Rosa is." Sadie continued after Butters nodded. "That's why I dragged her blonde ass to this party. I was hoping she would socialize. She didn't so I threw her in the closet with the first guy I thought of. Kenny seemed to be interested in girls, a lot without being as creepy as Clyde. So I chose him. Hopefully, he makes a move or something and they hook up. If not, I'll just keep trying to set her up with different guys." Sadie explained. Butters didn't know how he felt about this. He tried to hide his discomfort but Sadie clearly noticed.

"You're not gonna tell anybody, right?" She arched her brow.

"Um...um....er, no I suppose not. But shouldn't she do these things on her own? Kenny is a sex-crazed guy. Are you sure you want your friend with a fella like Kenny? Sure, he's nice but he doesn't have a lot of money, he's sex-obsessed and he likes getting high." Butters bit his lip. He did like Kenny but if Sadie was trying to get her shy friend to get a boyfriend, then Kenny wasn't really a good match. But what did Butters know? He didn't know Rosa. Maybe they could be fine together but after what Cartman said, it's not likely they'd get together.

"Hm, I guess you're right. She probably won't even talk to him. I knew it was a longshot but at least I tried. Who do you think would make a good boyfriend for her? I'm determined to find that girl some love. She's too quiet and reserved." Sadie asked him.

"I-I don't really know much about Rosa or relationships but I guess I could try?" Butters offered. Sadie thanked him.

"Not Cartman or Clyde, I've already knocked them off the list. Tweek is too hyper for her, Stan and Token are in relationships already. Craig's too boring from what I've noticed tonight. Rosa likes to talk once she's comfortable with someone so Timmy might not work. You've said Kenny is a dude obsessed with sex and drugs. I don't want that for Rose. That leaves you, Jimmy and what's that kid's name in the green hat? Cartman was calling him 'Kahl' right? Is that his name?" Sadie analyzed. Butters giggled. Kahl. Cartman's stupid pronunciation...

"Kahl....Heh heh....No, his name is Kyle. Cartman just pronounces some stuff funny sometimes. His name is Kyle Broflovski. He's Jewish and pretty friendl-" Butters stopped. It suddenly occurred to him that Sadie had said he was suitable for her best friend. "Wait. Did you say m-me?"

"Yeah, you seem nice enough. I'll have to get to know you, Kyle and Jimmy better. Who will win my best friend's heart?" Sadie exclaimed in a dramatic WWE type voice. Butters palms started to sweat. Rosa sure was pretty but what if he didn't pass Sadie's expectations?

"Aw hamburgers." He muttered under his breath. "Well, Jimmy is a nice fella too. He does stand-up comedy." Boy, Jimmy would be tough competition to beat. Kyle, even harder. He thought about sabotaging their chances of getting with Rosa but Butters couldn't bring himself to say anything bad about his friends.

"Rosa loves to laugh. She doesn't do well with negative people. She's very kind so she'd probably like a nice guy. I guess if the game is on, I shouldn't give you knowledge advantages, huh?" She grinned. Butters mimicked her grin. Maybe he could win, he was friendly. He wasn't much of a comedian but he could always find some jokes on Google. But what about Lexas? He hadn't seen Lexas for what seemed like a millennium. His parents said she wasn't really into him, that she just flirted with guys for tips. Even Lexas had told him that but he hadn't wanted to believe it. He still didn't. This was the only way to move on, he decided. Maybe if he dated Rosa, he'd get over Lexas. I'll do it. Butters told himself. He'd try to win over Rosa against Jimmy and Kyle. It would be hard, he knew, but he would certainly do his best. Sadie interrupted his thoughts.

"Alright, glad we got that settled. Let's go back now." The two continued down the stairs, taking their places beside the guests, who were gathered around Cartman. Some were taking pictures, some were trying to help him and some people were just standing around.


	6. Cold Kisses And Coffee-Snatching

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sadie messes with Rosa and Kenny from outside the closet.

**06\. Cold Kisses And Coffee-Snatching**

**Rosa**

"Holy shit, it's one in the morning." Kenny gasped, looking at his phone. The battery in the corner of the screen was almost empty except for a small red line. Almost dead, she knew.

"Wow, we got in here at what...eleven?" Rosa guessed. Kenny nodded.

"Sounds like it's much better and safe here. I didn't like the sound of 'Lick the shit!' It's insanely hot in here though. It'd be nicer, temperature wise, out there. We could request they turn the temperature down." He suggested. Rosa nodded. It was much too hot in here. They stopped cuddling a long time ago. Not because they wanted to, but because it was just too hot. She had taken off her coat early on but now she had also rolled up her jeans. Kenny was wearing nothing but his boxer shorts, to Rosa's delight. When he wasn't looking, she would steal glances at his body. His body was nicely toned, the right amount of muscle that matched her preferences. Kenny stretched and leaned against the closet door.

"Hey, could you at least turn the heating down? It's scorching in here!" He shouted.

**Sadie**

Sadie heard Kenny's request. God, it must be really warm in there. I'm just glad I'm not in there. Suddenly, she thought of song lyrics.

"It's gettin' hot in here, so take off all your clothes."

Sadie grinned. She snickered but then thought about her conversation with Butters. I suppose I'll be nice and turn the heating down. She approached the closet and looked at the thermostat. She cringed at the temperature it displayed. Sadie knew nothing about temperature and weather in South Park, but she knew that the temperature was too high for comfort. The climate was much different in her hometown. She turned it down so it was much lower. There, hopefully that's good.

"Okay, I turned it down. I'm not changing it again, though. Hopefully you're happy." Sadie told them. She turned around and rejoined the party, which was slowing down now. Most of the guests were crashed on the couch and floor.

**Rosa**

Kenny and Rosa sighed in unison as the heat decreased.

"Much better." Rosa exhaled with pure relief. Kenny smiled at her, which she took as agreement. The temperature in the closet declined rapidly, making it better and better. By the time it had finally gotten to the perfect temperature, it had kept going down.

"Hey, is it getting a little too cold to you?" Kenny asked suddenly. It was. Rosa rolled her jeans down and reached for her coat, just in case.

"Yeah, actually. It's-" She shivered. The temperature had diminished quite quickly. It was very cold now. "F-freezing." Kenny shrugged his parka back on at the same time she had put her coat on. Rosa didn't do well in the cold. She got cold quite easily, which is why she preferred the summer time. Kenny looked at Rosa shivering in the corner. His blue eyes looked sympathetic. Rosa longed to resume their interrupted cuddle but she was too shy to ask or act. As if he read her mind, Kenny extended his arms, inviting her in. Rosa slid over and huddled up against him. Kenny's arms closed around her and he rested his head on top of hers. The air in the closet was frigid, sending shivers down her spine. Luckily, it had stopped declining but it was still extremely chilly. Kenny slipped his glove off and touched Rosa's cheek.

"You're getting quite cold Rosa." He sounded quite concerned. Warmth spread across her cheek as Kenny gently kissed her cheek. She smiled and she would have blushed if she had been warmer. Rosa brought her eyes up to meet his. She lowered her eyes to his lips. Her mind returned to the kiss towards the beginning of the dare. The moment their lips touched in her flashback sent shivers down her spine. Not the bad kind, but the good kind. Kenny noticed her stare.

"What are you staring at?" He asked softly, studying her face. Oops, he caught me. Her eyes turned to the floor and she bit her lip.

"Your lips...:" She admitted, looking at him again for a brief second. To her relief, Kenny smirked.

"Why? Do they look blue like yours?" He grinned. I knew it was cold in here, but I didn't think it was that cold. Rosa brought her hands to her lips and used her breath to warm her hands, pressing her warmed hands to her lips. Her lips were icy, making her flinch.

"Wow, they are cold." Rosa repeated her attempt at warming them.

"Let me help." Kenny pulled her onto his lap and he tenderly pressed his lips against hers. His lips were cold like hers, but Rosa didn't mind. Spending all this time with Kenny was amazing to her. She just hoped he would pay attention to her when they were at school again. What if he's just excited from the party and he just ditches me afterwards? Rosa thought as she kissed him. Rosa, girl, get a hold of yourself. It's just a kiss, a second kiss. So what if he does? The truth was, she really liked him. Rosa wanted more than just a couple kisses inside a closet. She wanted to be with Kenny, but she knew she couldn't afford to think like that. She'd just end up hurting if she couldn't get that. Just enjoy the moment, no matter what outcome, Rosa told herself. Kenny broke from the kiss and looked at her.

"Better?" He bit his lip, fighting a grin.

"Much." Rosa grinned at him, causing him to lose his battle and grin.

"So, do you want to hang out at lunch on Monday?" He asked. Maybe it could be more than a small 'hook-up'. Maybe I do have a chance with him, she thought.

"Yeah, at your table or?" Rosa accepted.

"Fuck, I don't think you want to hang around Cartman, do you?" Kenny snickered.

"No, not particularly." She replied, her lips pulling into a smile.

"I didn't think so. I don't either. We could go for a walk, if you want. Stark's pond is nearby." He suggested. Rosa, still smiling, kissed Kenny's nose.

"I'd like that." She nodded. Kenny pulled her closer to him, Rosa still on his lap. He planted a kiss on her cheek which made Rosa huddle closer. She didn't think that the two could get any closer than that, but she soon found out that she was wrong. Rosa pushed her face deep into Kenny's chest and closed her eyes. Sleep washed over her, sending her into a peaceful sleep in Kenny's arms.

**Sadie**

Sadie rubbed her eyes, glancing around the room she awoke in. When did I fall asleep? She lifted her head to see Tweek staring at her, wide awake. Why is he looking at me like that? Jesus Fucking Christ. She realized then, that her 'comfy pillow' was really Tweek's legs. Oh, whoops.

"Have you been awake all night?" She yawned and he sighed after she removed her head from his lap. Tweek put his hand behind his head, avoiding eye-contact.

"Yeah... I don't usually sleep" He admitted before picking up a mug that smelled of coffee, the steam filling her nose with aromatic scents. Tweek sipped at it, making Sadie want the coffee more. Sadie had had enough of the desire for caffeine, so she snatched the warm mug from his twitching hands. Before he could object, she took a long drink. "What the fu-" Tweek hissed. Sadie pressed her finger to his lips and shushed him. She winked and returned his coffee. Tweek froze, looking both confused and uncomfortable. Sadie smiled before kissing his cheek. She lay back down on his lap.

"G'night then." Sadie laughed.


	7. The Big-Boned Momma's Boy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning arrives, and Sadie finally lets Rosa and Kenny out of the closet, but it isn't as great as they had hoped because Kenny confronts Cartman.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just realized there was enough for a chapter just sat in the document, waiting to be posted. Oops. It has been written for a long time. So, here it is!

**07\. The Big-Boned Momma's Boy**

**Rosa**

Rosa woke up and stretched, hitting her hands and arms against the walls. Oh yeah…. forgot about the closet situation. Kenny woke up, too. He went to stretch like she did, but she guessed that he realized there was no room early on.

“Morning.” He yawned, smiling at her. Rosa smiled back at Kenny.

“Morning.” She replied. Rosa had fallen asleep in Kenny’s arms, she was still curled up in his lap.

“Do you think they’ll even let us out today?” Rosa asked.

“I hope so. My back hurts from being cramped up in here.” Kenny replied. Rosa nodded in agreement. “We can kick their asses when we get out of here.” Kenny joked. Rosa laughed. Kenny leaned over and kissed her cheek. Rosa turned her face to his and pressed her lips to his. It was a quick kiss, unlike the other kisses they shared. She cuddled with Kenny, waiting for the closet to be opened.

**Sadie**

Sadie woke up, once again in Tweek’s lap. Light filled Eric Cartman’s room. She yawned and stood up.

“Hey, guys. We should probably let those two out now. That was more like ‘a Millennium in Heaven’ rather than ‘Seven Minutes In Heaven.’” Sadie called out to the party guests who were just waking up.

“You’re right. That’s an awful long time to be in a closet with someone.” Butters agreed. Sadie nodded. She approached the closet door and opened it a crack to find Kenny and Rosa curled up together. The two looked up at her and stood up. She opened the door all the way and let them out.

“Welcome back, you two.” Sadie grinned. She turned to Rosa. “You will tell me everything, girl.” Rosa rolled her eyes. Suddenly Kenny went rushing by Sadie and Rosa. The two girls looked at each other with confusion.

“Look guys, Kenny finally came out of the closet.” Cartman snickered, clutching a bucket of KFC. Eric looked at Rosa. “Don’t come near me, you’re infected now.”

“Fuck you, fatass!” Kenny shouted, his voice muffled.

“EY! I’m not fat, I’m just big-boned.” Cartman defended himself.

“Yeah, you keep telling yourself that when you’re six hundred pounds.” Sadie rolled her eyes, poking Cartman in one of his fat rolls. The roll jiggled under her touch. Kyle and Stan snickered in the background.

“Well you must have some squishy-ass bones.” Sadie remarked, taking a sip of the coffee that she had just stolen from Tweek.

“EY!” Cartman repeated. “Well at least I don’t have herpes and gonorrhea like blondie and Kenny.” Sadie sighed, taking another sip. Tweek twitched, reaching for his stolen coffee cup.

“FUCK YOU!” Kenny screamed. He charged at Cartman and leaped into the air. Kenny threw a punch and hit Cartman directly in the face. Cartman cursed and snatched a clean chicken bone from his bucket. Eric snapped the bone, creating a sharp point on the end.

“Uh oh.” Rosa whispered behind Sadie. Cartman thrust the sharp bone at Kenny. Kenny dodged the bone, receiving only a small scratch. He swore and kicked Eric in the leg.

“Ow! Fuck!” Cartman growled. “Maaaaaaaammm! Keeeennyyyy’s being meeeeaaaannn!!!” He squealed.

“Momma’s boy.” Sadie sighed. Cartman roared and shoved the chicken bone straight into Kenny’s heart. A scream erupted from Rosa’s throat, who had been hiding behind Sadie. Blood spurted from Kenny’s wound as he collapsed to the floor. Kenny’s eyes closed and his body went limp.

“Oh my God! They killed Kenny!” Stan gasped.

“You bastard!” Kyle exclaimed.

“Noooooooo!!!” Rosa shrieked, running over to Kenny’s lifeless body.

“Woah, she actually talks?” Craig asked, looking at Rosa.

“Holy friggin’ Jesus-nuggets ball-sacs shit-cakes Satan’s mother of God!” Sadie shouted. Everyone stared at her in confusion. “This coffee is great!” Sadie smiled at Tweek, completely ignoring the dead body on the ground.

“Does nobody care?” Rosa choked, so quiet that only Sadie could hear.

“I better get home. If I’m late, I’ll get grounded!” Butters waved to everyone, exiting the house. Many of the other guests started to leave. Rosa was still clutching Kenny’s body.

“Come on Rose, you can’t stay there forever.” Sadie put her hand on Rosa’s shoulder. She helped her friend up and they headed towards the door.

“Nice party, Eric.” Sadie grinned.

“Why thank you. Now get out ma house!” Cartman replied. Sadie stuck up her middle finger and escorted Rosa out of the house. She walked Rosa home. Poor girl. Maybe she has depression or something. Why is she so sad? Sadie couldn’t think of anything that happened at the party to make her sad. Maybe being thrown in the closet? They were cuddling when I opened it, did he say something rude afterwards? That asshole better not have…

**Rosa**

Rosa curled up into a ball on her bed. The first guy she’s kissed or shared something special with and he died. He’s gone...Cartman killed him…. She sobbed. Nobody cared! Everyone just stood around and acted like it never happened! Do they kill people often? I can’t go to school with people like that? What if I’m next? Rosa’s mind ran frantically. She kept sobbing and sobbing, clutching her pillow for comfort. Her pillow wasn’t as comforting as Kenny’s body had been. She fell asleep, tears staining her pillow.

**Kenny**

Kenny awoke in his bed. Dying sucks, he thought. That one was quite painful, Kenny remembered. His mind went to Rosa. He enjoyed his time with her in the closet. Kenny decided to go visit her. She won’t remember that you died, Kenny sighed. Nobody ever remembered his deaths. They go on with life like it never happened. He got up and headed downstairs, tightening the parka around his face.

“Have a good day Kinny. Don’t be out too long now.” His mother called out to him. Kenny nodded and began his journey to Rosa’s house. She had told him where she lived when they were in the closet.

Kenny headed up the steps of her house. He suddenly felt nervous. What if she doesn’t want to see me? Kenny shuddered. The doorbell chimed after his fingers met the button. He heard footsteps from inside. A blonde woman opened the door.

“Hey is Rosa around?” Kenny asked the woman, exposing his face slightly so she could understand him. She nodded.

“She’s very upset about something. She won’t talk to me, maybe you can cheer her up.” The woman replied, motioning to the stairs. “Her room is the first door to the right.” Kenny nodded. He made his way up the stairs. A light sobbing could be heard from outside Rosa’s room. He paused outside the door. What if she regrets kissing me or something like that? Kenny thought the problem was him. He knocked on the door to alert Rosa of his presence. Rosa was curled in a ball, crying, when he walked in.

“Rosa, what’s wrong?” Kenny crouched by her bedside. Rosa looked up and suddenly her eyes grew very wide.

“Y-y-you-you’re dead!” Rosa shrieked backing against the wall. Did she say dead?!

“Did you just say that I’m dead?” Kenny asked, shocked. She nodded, tears down her face.

“C-Cartman stabbed you with the chicken bone!” She exclaimed.

“You remembered?” Kenny was thrilled. Nobody remembered his deaths. She did.

“How could I forget? You were stabbed and you died in front of me!” She replied. “Everyone just acted normal, why?”

“This may sound weird but I need you to be open minded.” Kenny started. She nodded so he continued, “I don’t stay dead. I get killed all the time but I wake up in my bed after and nobody remembers my deaths.” Kenny explained. Rosa’s face was white as a sheet. Tears still ran down Rosa’s cheeks and Kenny wrapped his arms around her. He pulled her onto his lap and he cradled her.

“It’s okay. I know it’s fucked up and hard to believe but I’m alright. I’m here.” Kenny soothed, rocking her.

After a long moment of silence, Rosa asked “Does it hurt?” Kenny sighed. His deaths did hurt. He remembered them and the pain they brought. He shuddered as he remembered the chicken bone piercing his heart. He didn’t want to freak Rosa out more than she already was but he didn’t want to lie to her either.

“Yes.” Kenny answered. Kenny still couldn’t believe that she remembered him dying. Nobody ever remembered but she did. This girl has to be special, Kenny thought.

“Are you okay now?” Rosa asked, looking up at him. He nodded, planting a kiss on her lips. Rosa had been clinging to him quite tightly. He assumed this was because she was still traumatized by his death. She continued to stare at him so he kissed her again, making that kiss last longer than the previous one.


End file.
